Blog 1 : Society’s Definition of Masculinity

February 19, 2024

Everybody experiences things in different ways and when it comes to masculinity, which can be a complex topic, many factors come in place. Such as the outside influence and how an individual expresses themselves. In this text, I will discuss how masculinity is experienced and how the world around us is somewhat the cause. From the text written by Carlos Andres Gomez (Guy’s Club) to the short film “Invincible” by Vincent Rene-Lortie 

Starting with Carlos, the main character in the Guy’s Club text and how he experienced masculinity internally. At the beginning of the story, when Carlos was six years old, he didn’t know much about gender norms and that’s why he wanted to get his nails painted. To him, it was just nails, but as soon as he went outside, he got made fun of. He went from being a happy little boy to being ashamed. After that incident he couldn’t understand what he did wrong. To be faced with something like that at such an early age can be confusing. Externally, Carlos understood that he had to enforce his masculinity in certain ways like keeping up in the gym to stay in shape and satisfy his dad. Being “man enough” was an issue for him growing up since he was a sensitive kid. << Growing up my friends and I would always tell each other to stop being a bitch or a pussy anytime someone showed weakness and vulnerability.>> explained Carlos in the text. Having to adapt to these norms can often change a person and their morals.  

The people around have a huge influence on someone. In Carlos’s case it was his dad, society and again, the norm. For example, when he went on that trip to Zambia where he saw that not everybody lives like Americans. But the world around him influenced him so much that he felt uncomfortable with the actions of this new environment. I can’t help but wonder if his surroundings were different, would he still be the Carlos that he is now? If his dad didn’t enforce these masculinity norms into him, would he have felt more comfortable around certain topics? And it comes to the fact that society makes a person, tells them how to act, how to dress, how to feel and if they don’t, they will face judgment, isolation and bullying. 

Connecting that with Marc’s case from the short film “Invincible”. Throughout the film, I perceived him as a kind, thoughtful, loving and smart boy, from the way he carefully took care of that bee, from the way he wrote that heartfelt poem in class and from the love and affection he shows when he’s with his sister. But why is he acting that way on the outside? Why is he representing himself as a troubled and careless boy? And how did he end up in the juvenile center? I’m assuming it’s because the world doesn’t see his true self, but he’s hiding it from them as well. Marc found ways to cope with the circumstances, he likes being in the water because he feels at peace and free but tends to play with fire when he feels overwhelmed and sad. He never asked for help, maybe because he feared being judged for showing emotions. After all, all the boys in that center have strong characters, except one. He was known for crying himself to sleep and Marc helped him, I believe that he saw himself in the little boy. 

Finally, the institution robbed him of the thing he wanted the most, freedom. It also felt like the principal of the center was pressuring Marc by threatening him with taking away that freedom. I think that these influences were so strong that Marc had to take his life in order to be free. In my opinion, the similarity between Marc and Carlos is peer pressure and societal influence. Because of these factors, Carlos had to learn how to act, who to love and what to look like. Marc couldn’t ask for help and had to deal with everything on his own. All of that because society decided that a man can’t be weak and must act certain ways. 

-Ludovicka M.