Blog 2: Rethinking Masculinity

In Western sociocultural, boys and men are susceptible to conceiving toxic masculinity that can be seen in extreme behaviours shown in the documentaries Charlottesville: Race and Terror and Inside Incel.  Males can perceive a toxic distorted idea of masculinity in part because of the fear and the violent reaction that comes with it when their masculinity is threatened.

According to Kimmel’s essay, the fear of humiliation pushes boys and men to toxic masculinity seen as extreme behaviours. Indeed, Kimmel defines well how the interaction of social and cultural elements urges men to appear without fear: “Fear makes us ashamed, because the recognition of fear in ourselves is proof to ourselves that we are not as manly as we pretend […]” (KIMMEL 147). Society insists on meeting masculinity’s rules to avoid being humiliated. As Kimmel explained, boys and men wear masks to create the illusion that they are capable of being the perfect masculine model. However, when their masculinity is in danger, fear, as a primitive instinct, naturally emerges. For instance, Kimmel asked his classes how to determine if a man is homosexual, and most of the answers to this question revealed that males try to suppress the fear of being associated with unmanly characteristics: “Never dress that way. Never talk or walk that way. Never show your feelings or get emotional. Always be prepared to demonstrate sexual interest in women that you meet, so it is impossible for any woman to get the wrong idea about you” (KIMMEL 148). As can be noticed in these statements, the repetition of “never” shows that manhood norms must be extreme to prove enough their masculinity. The answers of Kimmel’s students demonstrate that masculinity can be unhealthy because insecurities invade the image of themselves: “As young men we are constantly riding those gender boundaries, checking the fences we have constructed on the perimeter, making sure that nothing even remotely feminine might show through. The possibilities of being unmasked are everywhere…” (KIMMEL 148). According to the definition of masculinity in Western culture, men can either incarnate the image of the ideal man or be humiliated. Furthermore, this definition can cause frustration and fear inside men who compare themselves to what society desires to see. As Ross Handler, a professor specializing in deviance and youth sub-culture, affirms some individuals search for support in online communities because they might have fail to attain thos perfect image of man. Incel members are validated when they contribute to unhealthy masculinity by asserting their dominance and suppressing their fear. As Kimmel claims, boys and men have this pressure to suppress their emotions to disappear their vulnerability. According to Incel’s ideology, having anti-feminist behaviour and using violence reflect their hypermasculinity. Again, men who conform to toxic masculinity are much more likely to engage in violence against women.

According to Kimmel’s perspective, a distorted image of masculinity encourages the use of violence as seen in the documentaries Charlottesville: Race and Terror and Inside Incel. Indeed, Unite the Right wants to prove to the world how powerful they are through their violence. In McIntire Park, Elle Reeve representing Vice News and Christopher Cantwell discussed Unite the Right’s ideology, an online group. Cantwell representing a white nationalist speaker of Unite The Right said “[of] course, we are capable” of unveiling our power. “I’m carrying a pistol; I go to the gym all the time. I’m trying to make myself more capable of violence.” Unite The Right’s ideology appeals to violence just like Incel does because violence proves your masculinity. Men failing to achieve manhood rules are submitted in both groups to do terrible actions such as hurting and killing others. As a result, these groups integrate a toxic principle of masculinity that validates physical toughness, and physical aggression. Before Minissian’s attack, this Incel member posted a message celebrating Eliot Rodger’s perspective. All Incel members are illusioned with the excitement to regain power after being treated unfairly by a feminist culture that does not value them. They show to the world who is “the truth alpha male” as Rodger pleaded. Anyone who follows one of the most inaccurate manhood rules, being violent, is seen as a hero in both communities. After Minissian’s attack with his white van on April 23rd, 2023 in North Toronto, a song created by a YouTuber and video gamer named Egg White was dedicated to inspire other members to glorify violence. In both documentaries, these groups carry on their actions toxic masculinity traits: detach from emotions, be tough and dominate others.  For instance, in the documentary Charlottesville: Race and Terror, one of the members of Unite the Right did not hesitate to drive a car into the crowd. Kimmel’s point is illustrated in these examples seen in the documentaries because manhood dominates their minds and feelings. Kimmel explains that toxic masculinity leads boys and men to always protect their dignity by showing characteristics of manhood from Western socioculture. If they don’t fit in society, fear installs inside themselves and troubles their dignity. Kimmel made a bet with a friend that if he goes into any American playground and asks six-year-old boys who is a sissy, he can prove that distorted masculinity leads males to defend masculine masks. Kimmel described how young boys are conditioned to react to situations that threaten their sense of dignity. In many cases, if they don’t adhere to the traditional rules of manhood, they feel compelled to resort to violent or overly masculine behaviours in order to gain respect from others and themselves. Most individuals like young boys are unconscious that they let society’s expectations influence them. When James was presenting toxic masculinity in the auditorium, it was difficult for students to wrap their heads around a subject that brought many unclear feelings. People generally tend to avoid discussions where they can be pointed out in their vulnerabilities. Indeed, no one likes to feel vulnerable in the eyes of others.

According to Charlottesville: Race and Terror, Inside Incel, Masculinity as Homophobia and “Online Influencers, Toxic Masculinity, and the Classroom,” manhood has always encouraged boys and men to fit in a principle of masculinity that damages everyone. Some individuals cope with the fear of protecting their masculinity by resorting to violence. If boys and men fail to conform to the traditional masculinity definition, then they must be put back on track by using violence against themselves and others. Unfortunately, it has been a recurring issue throughout history. Yet, society still fails to learn from his past mistakes. We tend to swing from one extreme to another without finding a balance. There is a lack of education that men just as women are allowed to have feelings. Thus, society should recognize that vulnerability composes the identity of men because vulnerability defines human beings.

Bibliography:

Kimmel, Michael. Masculinity as Homophobia. 1994.
Charlottesville: Race and Terror. YouTube, Vice News, 14 Aug. 2017, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P54sP0Nlngg&t=5s. Accessed 28 Mar. 2022.

Inside Incel, CBC, The Fifth Estate, 27 Jan. 2019, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqWjCHPg9gA. Accessed 25 Sept. 2023.

James, Will, Online Influencers, Toxic Masculinity, and the Classroom, Vanier College, March 5, 2024